There are lots of myths about domestic abuse. Some people think these are facts - they are not. These myths can be confusing and can make it harder for people who are living with domestic abuse.

The truth behind the myths

Myth: People who experience domestic abuse are sometimes to blame

No one makes someone else be abusive and no one deserves to be abused. Any type of abuse is wrong and the person it is happening to is never to blame.

Myth: Children sometimes cause domestic abuse to happen

Children are never responsible for domestic abuse. Children can't make adults be abusive and children can't make adults stop being abusive.

Myth: Children who live with domestic abuse grow up to be victims or abusers

Children who live with domestic abuse don't automatically grow up to have relationships with abusive people or to be abusive themselves. Lots of children who have lived with domestic abuse grow up determined to live free of domestic abuse.

Myth: Adults can hide domestic abuse from children

Most children know if domestic abuse is happening. Adults might try and hide it but children usually know that it is going on. If domestic abuse is happening to you or someone you know it is important to get help.

Myth: As many men experience domestic abuse as women

Both women and men can experience domestic abuse. But it mostly happens to women.

Myth: Domestic abuse happens more in some cultures and communities than others

Domestic abuse can happen to anyone. It doesn't matter where you live, what religion, race or ethnicity you are or how much money you have. Domestic abuse happens to adults and can also happen to young people who are dating.

Myth: Drink and drugs cause domestic abuse

Many people who drink too much or take drugs are not abusive. Domestic abuse does not only happen when someone is drunk or has taken drugs.

People might try to use alcohol or drugs as an excuse, saying things like, ‘I was drunk’ or ‘I don't remember’. Even if they really do not remember, it does not make it OK.

Domestic abuse - no excuse